... A Sour Apple Tree
Your source for fast and/or frozen food reviews, Huntington and/or West Virginia commentary, rasslin' (not wrestling) nostalgia, bad parody, dumb satire, rejected slogans, pointless lists, unreliable sports predictions, and funny local pictures.
- Name: Chris James
- Location: Huntington, WV, United States
I'm a 33 year-old guy from Huntington, WV.
Friday, February 26, 2010
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Reason #3427 why Americans are tubby
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Monday, February 22, 2010
Douchey things overheard in Nawab the other night
"Are there vegetarians in India? Because I'm vegetarian..."
"Is the mango in the mango chicken...teeheeheehee...good mango?"
"Is that guy Mexican? He looks Mexican..."
"I bet a really light beer would be really great with this stuff!!"
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Actually, the collie looks kinda cool...
Monday, February 15, 2010
My Top Ten Winter Olympic Sports
2. Ice Hockey. International rules rawk. More scoring and less drag. I hope the NHL finally adopts some of the rules.
3. Moguls. Dear God, their knees must be shot by the time that they are 40.
4. Biathlon. Why don't West Virginians excel at this? Skiin' & shootin' at stuff sounds like a winner in Pocahontas County.
5. Snowboard Halfpipe. 'Cause we'll kick butt.
6. Curling. So surreal.
7. Snowboard Cross. Uhuhuuhhhuh. Crashes are cool. Yeah. hehemheheh.
8. Ladies' Figure Skating. Gymnasts w/ bewbs.
9. Luge. It reminds me of when we'd spray WD-40 on our plastic sleds and go off of the steepest hills on the mountain.
10. Hoth-athalon. It's the one where you ride around on a tauntaun and dismember wampas with a lightsaber. Um, maybe that one isn't real...
Sunday, February 14, 2010
When it's ok to mark out
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Monday, February 08, 2010
Top Ten Restaurant Food Items of the Moment
2. Tudor's Biscuit World's Mary B
3. Skyline Chili's 3-Way
4. Sam's Hot Dog Stand's dog/ spicy sauce, slaw, onions, and mustard
5. Chili's Southern Smokehouse Bacon Burger
6. Steak 'n Shake's Guacamole Burger
7. Jim's Steak and Spaghetti's spaghetti w/ meat sauce
8. Gold Star Chili's 3-Way
9. Husson's pizza w/ pepperoni & green pepper
10. New China Garden's Szechuan chicken
Sunday, February 07, 2010
Somewhere in Haiti..
Saturday, February 06, 2010
We in the killin' Jedi business.
Thursday, February 04, 2010
Tuesday, February 02, 2010
- The smartest pharmacist at St. Mary's is the 7th most knowledgeable person in Highlawn on the topic of prescription pain medication.
- The planning commission has allowed one---and only one---Santa Fe style house.
- The population density of Highlawn Avenue is 30,000/sq. mi.
- 30-somethings fondly recount shopping at Big Bear late at night to uncaring offspring.
- Once a local media personality showed up uninvited at the old ice rink to help coach a friend's hockey team and was mocked mercilessly.
- The new Rite Aid is a poor substitution for Highlawn Pharmacy.
- Everyone has their own "secret" recipe for Wiggin's spaghetti sauce.
- Garage apartments rawk.
- Latulle Avenue was once Huntington's center for underground cinema.
- Free refill trick: Two Speedways, one cup.
Monday, February 01, 2010
WVPBS does the impossible
How is that possible?
I think I'm going to start making "authentic French wine," right here in West Virginia, out of Kool-Aid & yeast in old glass pop bottles.** They can give it away with a $120 donation, too.
*Holl's is actually very good. By a box or twelve for Valentine's Day.
**Put a balloon on top. It will inflate and then deflate. That's how you'll know it is ready. The best environment is a second-floor locker, near the water fountain. So I hear.